The Iraq war has been a hot topic of conversation since the early eighties when Dictator Saddam Hussein launched indiscriminate ballistic-missile attacks on Iran and messed with chemical weapons. Since this time, millions of people have lost their lives, Islamic state extremists have emerged and a growing refugee crisis has forced the world to pay attention to the evolution of racism, religious discontent and the middle-eastern upheaval.

But what does the Iraq war or any war on terrorism have to do with us?

It’s an interesting question and one that billions of people informed or uninformed ask themselves regularly. Terrorism in any measure is defined by the unofficial or unauthorised use of violence to intimidate in the pursuit of political gain.

Terrorism has become an accepted term that citizens throughout the world recognise as the leading form of oppression and the greatest driving force between the breakdown of communication between religious sects and countries divided in belief. But again, how does this affect us? How is global terrorism affecting our commercialised consumer-driven lifestyles?

For one, the families of the soldiers on both sides of this equation are suffering with the loss of life and love. Though divided by purpose, these people share commonality and yet, compassion remains absent despite the loss being substantially equal.

Trust has ebbed between foreign leaders, allied armies and even the general populace. We are now so consumed by the fear of the unknown that racism often rears its ugly head. What was once celebrated as our differences is now scorned for its possibility of future wrong-doing.

No longer can we travel freely between countries of interest for fear of political backlash or religious agenda. We are screened at public airports for explosive devices and are regularly updated via social media about what is acceptable behaviour and what is not. Our differences as human beings once set the tone for the uniqueness that inspired the best in all of us, but now we huddle in mass and conform, mostly to maintain personal safety or avoid public scrutiny.

The effects of terrorism, localised discrimination or middle-eastern wars are so wide-spread and accepted as normal in this day and age it’s no wonder our evolutionary process has slowed in its tracks. Our intellect is poisoned by our emotional drive to avoid those people and activities that are different from us. Naturally it’s easy to assume that a change in perception will ultimately inspire correction in our global attitudes, but realism must be adopted.

Good vibes and peace and love sentiments from a small percentage don’t incite change, but in saying that, when the human race decides to stop believing that the individual has the power to make a real difference; to change perceptions and recalibrate government powers for the greater good, we will really see the effects of war and terrorism. Why? Because it means that we no longer care and that is simply unacceptable.

Kristy

How nice is too nice? 

Is there such a thing?

A lot of people would say that in a world filled with suffering, oppression, arrogance and disregard, being too nice couldn't possibly be something worthy of complaint. Usually I would agree, the world is seriously lacking in the sincerity and general kindness that this post hopes to inspire.

But what if your existence is nothing but a few thousand cubic meters of space and filled with people not generally influenced by the world on mass?

My town, for instance, is tucked away in the northern end of Australia; population approximately 160,000. There's enough people to create eccentricity, variation of cultural and religious belief as well as a government based on the ideals of the country's overall agenda, but still far enough removed to remain independent of major political upheaval. In this tiny town we may know the person living right next door or we may live with the window shades drawn in the hopes to remain anonymous; basic niceties are still expected regardless.

Being nice, to me, is respecting each individual's choices to live, breathe and work within this environment without judgement or expectation of certain behaviours. Being too nice would entail dropping baked goods on doorsteps each day or friends and colleagues calling hourly to check on one's wellbeing.

To be nice (or merely human) is to be considerate of your fellow man; let them merge into your traffic lane during rush hour. Let the neighbour's kids play cricket in your front yard when there's no safe place elsewhere. Let the elderly have your seat on public transport and of course, respect everyone's opinions yet still value your own.

It's all about balance. Being too nice isn't really a first world problem and to be fair, not the worst thing that anyone could encounter. There's no issue with overextending oneself or elaborating kindness; it can be annoying, but still much better than the alternative which is to not care at all. I personally know which one I'd prefer even if I do like to keep the shades drawn most days.

Kristy :)

Who Asks Who?

Talk of marriage has sprung up more than once in my household this week and to say that I'm both pleased and petrified by the thought would only be an admission of truth.

I suspect it might be the dream of many women globally to have the love of their life proclaim their undying devotion and desires for a future unending and filled with marital bliss. I'm not all that different, I even wonder occasionally how he will do it; billboard proposal, one knee, ring in a wine glass?

The truth is, the thought of our beloved lavishing us with hefty bouts of attention and adorning us with jewellery is a major drawcard to the sacred union, but what if your partner insists the shoe be on the other foot? What if he refuses to propose in the hopes that you do all the hard work for him?

Enter the modern man; expectations of equality have been raised by the modern woman, so why wouldn't he expect the idea of marriage proposals to be a two-way street?

I can't say I disagree, but even the modern woman wishes that romance was a candle not so quickly extinguished by the ideas of the 21st century. We want our cake and to eat it too and perhaps this is grossly unfair in this day and age, but when my boyfriend wishes I'd propose the idea of a life together, pick my own ring and organise everything before, during and after; I almost want to slap modern day feminists for inciting this role reversal!

When did this happen? When did my partner suddenly decide that he too deserved to be lavished with the attention and surprise of pending nuptials?

I have no answer and flatly refuse to give into this bid for equal rights. Perhaps I am selfish and old fashioned, but I'm also more than aware that on the relationship see-saw I don't ask for more than a partner can give and in this instance, I can keep teetering, bouncing up and down with the currents of our relationship until bended knee and extravagant rings appear.

Kristy :)

A List ...

I recently went out with a long-time friend that I had not seen in quite some time. As life usually goes, time gets away from us all and before you know it, eons have passed and everything you once knew about your friendship has changed.

This isn't always a bad thing. Change is about growth and more often than not it can strengthen the ties that originally bound you as friends or even help you to better understand the differences.

We've known each other since we were knee high to a grasshopper and back then we had grandiose ideas of saving the world, living together in a cubby house and never to be shackled to the ideas of the seemingly expected and ordinary.

Both now fully inducted into the world of adulthood, I took the route of random travel and creative solutions to my career which have never been particularly successful. I have bounced from job to job and ideas of my ultimate form of bliss. I may have seen the world, but I'm perpetually restless and without family. She on the other hand, studied hard in the science and mathematics field, earned herself multiple degrees and met the love of her life and started a beautiful family.

Never have two people been poles apart yet so closely linked by the ideals of our past. This of course was uncovered during our recent discussion about our successes and failures ... the things we still expect and want from a life only part way through.

She spoke to me about a list, nothing unheard of and most commonly known as a bucket list, I was curious. What was the point of writing random lists of the seemingly unachievable during our declining age?

Her answer was poetic; to write it down is to hold oneself accountable for your desires unfulfilled and yet it's completely achievable should you actually believe that your ambitions are worth pursuing.

I was floored and have thus considered that the list was not a flight of fancy anymore, but perhaps a true challenge to be pursued with vigor to not only enrich my life, but to remind me that regret would be ultimately more unfathomable than attempting to continue to invest in dreams unfulfilled.

Kristy :)

Monogamy becomes Monotonous?

When you become a couple; ergo, your single status is annihilated and you’re suddenly inhaling each other’s poo particles in the bathroom each morning, it’s amazing how quickly the mystery you’d worked so hard at maintaining is tossed aside in lieu of comfortability.

It begins with gas emissions. First these were simply a strange concept neither of you discussed nor indulged, but once in the comfort zone, many partners feel this is the green light to explore warming the bed sheets or easing the burden of a rather large meal by ‘tooting’ their appreciation.

Suddenly everyone’s burping, farting and regularly leaving the toilet bowl desecrated. There’s no more mid-week bonks on the kitchen bench and clipping fingernails becomes an afterthought. Do I even mention the weight gain and decidedly lacklustre attempt to brush one’s hair on the weekend?

I personally HATE this trend towards laziness, because that’s exactly what it is … laziness. When did it become okay not to respect your partner’s vested interest in you? When is it okay for a woman to stop dressing to impress or a man to release all bodily functions? I for one vote to always keep the mystery, attempt to re-claim romance regularly and to maintain a high standard of hygiene, otherwise what’s the point of monogamy if suddenly it becomes monotonous?

Just my view …

Kristy J