Kristy Berridge ... Just ... Gone

Christina & Me

Hello all, long time no post!

I've been wrapped up in author interviews, book releases and book reviews lately, so you haven't really had a chance to take a stroll in the whacky world of me.

Well, a lot has happened since we chatted last. My younger brother claims that I have finally become a woman since breaking the virginal status and claiming my first tattoo. And can I just say ... never again!

Aman & Christina

Don't get me wrong, I adore the design and can't praise my tattooist highly enough, but bloody hell, whoever says it doesn't hurt really is full of s@#$t.

Christina, Me & Chantelle

Okay, so besides getting inked up, something I took thirty-one years to carefully consider, I didn't exactly sit back and plan last Saturday night. I mean, you know me. I'm the girl that sits in front of her laptop, eats peanut butter and goes to the gym for fun.

Apparently not anymore.

Can someone say Vodka Soda?

Oh yeah. Mix calorie reduced alcohol with the infectious desire to have fun emanating from my single female friends  and all of a sudden I'm throwing on a black mini, tousling my hair, slapping on lipstick and heading out to a nightclub.

Pick your chins up off the floor! I know it's a foreign concept but I swear it happened and have no idea why I haven't let my hair down sooner. I honestly had so much fun it's ridiculous. The pleasant hum of too much spirits robbed me of inhibition and blighted the otherwise unsightly blisters formed from hours of dancing. I inhaled the cheap aftershave of men far too young for me and attempted to sing along to a band I'd never heard of until that night. Naturally I was insanely humourous and managed to avoid a hang over. All in all the night was a massive success  thanks in massive part to best girlfriends who refused to leave the Hobbit behind when it came to experiencing any and all illicit activity.

Next Saturday? I'll keep you posted.

Have a good one,

Kristy :)

Danger Mouse

Sometimes I hate Saturday posts. I've barely just finished doing the Follow Friday meme before I drag my tired ass off to bed and then boom, it's Saturday, I have to work and then pull down the post I just put up and a erect a new one.
Yes, I sound like a disgruntled council worker, but truly, on a Saturday, sometimes I'm brain dead and really have to scrape the bottom of the barrel for a decent read for you all. Alas, today is no different. My rather uneventful life has thrown yet another mediocre week at me that I feel obliged not to bore you with. So, in light of the fact that I am truly uninspiring this week, I thought I'd post about a friend who consistently makes me laugh with her urban tales of foreign room mates, and her unashamed deluge into foot and mouth disease.

I'm going to call her "Danger Mouse".
So Danger Mouse has a way with words, sentences recently erupting from her mouth like; 'I'd slaughter an orphan for parents like yours', and 'I'll give you five cents to saw my foot off'. Although, nothing quite beats, 'Agh, my cat scratched my palm and now I look like the Easter Jesus'.
Other stimulating conversations with outsiders have included:

Stranger: 'You should have seen my son when he was born. He was two pounds nothing with long legs like a frog.'
Danger Mouse: 'So did you take lots of photos of him among shrubbery?'. *deftly shows how small baby could have hidden in dense foliage with long spindly legs*
Stranger: *laughs politely, looking for exit*

Danger mouse has also informed a gay man that 'no sucking is allowed', scared the crap out of her boss by hiding in storage cupboards and screaming 'boo' in an effort to see how quickly she can cause angina, and I hear, confused someone who has narcolepsy with a necrophiliac.
Um ... yeah.
I love Danger Mouse. She is a petite showstopper with a seemingly endless stream of irrational thought and an honest to God deranged sense of humour. I'm not sure how I'd cope Monday mornings without her. Thanks, Danger Mouse - for giving me a Saturday blog I can reflect on, knowing there's an excellent chance you might kill me next time I see you in some weird and wonderfully "Dangerous" way.
Happy Saturday all,

Kristy :)