google-site-verification: google935433b691795853.html KRISTY BERRIDGE: 2011-12-11

Saturday 17 December 2011

Crazy Shenanigans

I just finished watching the movie 'The Hangover Part 2' and needless to say, besides laughing myself stupid, I was left wondering WTF? Do people really get up so messed up when taking partying to the extreme that they simply forget all the crazy crap they got up to?
I realise this film exacerbates actuallity, but dang - Drug dealers, smoking monkeys, FBI stakeouts and extreme facial tatoos? I'm pretty sure I'd remember saying yes to a dirty needle in a Bangkok side alley, never mind the she-man sex in a seedy stripper club to top off the night.
Now I'm sure this sounds confusing to anyone who hasn't watched these movies, and though they are good for a laugh (several laughs), I do have to wonder if there's anyone out there that extreme. I mean, really, I'm just dying to know if you've got a similar tale. I may be too green or classified as boringly sensible to get wasted enough to ninja kick a random in the goolies, wear my underwear on my hands or try to fly from the neighbour's roof in a homemade space ship. But surely one of you out there has a tale more harrowing than that of the movies?
Please tell me that someone has faked their own death just to scare the crap out of a coroner, or that you made a raft entirely from blown up condoms and attempted a river race? Better yet, you filmed yourself cow tipping and got kicked in the face by a pissed off bull.
Classic.
Well, if you are game enough to leave comment, we'd love to hear it. And I say 'we' because I'm so publishing it if you do - no exceptions. Unless of course you use a mountain of filthy words or I vomit in my mouth just a little bit.
For those of you that have gotten up to no good but don't want to explain due to certain circumstance that could lead to future indictment, just tick the damn funny box - that always makes me laugh anyway.
Have a good one everyone!

Kristy :)

Friday 16 December 2011

Follow Friday #11

Happy Friday everyone!
Yes, it’s that time of week again where bloggers unite to participate in the Follow Friday venture. The idea behind #FF is to promote traffic to your own blog, make new friends with other like-minded bloggers and discuss new and interesting topics each week.
Participating is simple. First you need to follow my blog because I’m totally awesome, then you can follow me on Twitter @kristyberridge (actually you don’t have to do this, it’s wishful thinking), but do follow my blog or assassins will get you …
Then you must follow our illustrious hosts Rachel of http://www.parajunkee.com/ and Alison of http://www.alisoncanread.com/ If you want more details on how to enter your own blog in the follow and hop, all directions are on their webpages
Now, once you’ve followed, check out my answer to this week’s questions and don’t forget to leave a comment so I can do the right thing and follow you back!

This week's question: When you've read a book, what do you do with it? (Keep it, give it away, donate it, sell it, swap it?)

Answer: I keep it! I catalogue it on Goodreads and in on my own personal document with a rating system, and then stack it neatly on my bookshelves. I just can't give them away, they bring me so much joy!

Wednesday 14 December 2011

In My Mailbox ... Whatever

As you all know I'm relatively new to the blogging community. I mostly started so I could promote myself as a writer, but of course now this once a week foray into cyberspace has grown into an unstoppable force! People actually want to read the crap that spews forth from my mouth - You know ... My third leg, battle with bugs, my issues with not impacting my head on every solid object in sight and of course, my ongoing battle with Cindy Crawford (which by the way, I'm totally winning).
So for that alone, you guys are awesome for not cutting loose or rolling your eyes. Especially when I make it clear that today's post is the 'I'm crazy jealous of your freaking mailbox' post.
Are you still with me?
Good, because I've recently become aware of this semi regular posting on other book reviewers and writer's blogs known as 'In My Mailbox'. Generally it has a picture of the mountain of books these lucky people have received in the mail to review from publishing houses, authors and agents. Sounds pretty good, doesn't it?
Well, here's a picture of my mailbox.


See? That's what sweet f@#*k all looks like. 

So, in light of the fact that in the foreseeable future my mailbox will probably continue to look like a moldy shoe box filled with biting ants and mystery sand, I thought I'd feature what I wish was in my mailbox. Albeit not everything is going to fit. But let's pretend it makes perfect sense - Like a fat man in a red suit sliding down billions of chimneys every Christmas eve and never once having to call emergency services ... hmmm.

Okay, in my mailbox I would really like;
1. Alcide Herveaux from True Blood - Number one, he's totally delicious. Number two, delicious things are meant to be eaten. Number three, I'm hungry now.
2. An Audi R8 - What can I say? I like pretty cars and that is a very pretty car.
3. An exotic holiday - Now when I say exotic, I don't mean dump me in the jungle where I get Mange or Dengue fever. I'm talking about somewhere secluded, somewhere balmy ... somewhere Alcide feels comfortable without pants.
4. Fat free, non diarrhea inducing chocolate - Yes, I'm aware that such a thing is tantamount to finding the Holy Grail, but I'd really like it. Especially now that I'm hungry, have a pant-less Alcide swinging on a hammock, beckoning me with the promise of no calorie complications.
5. Well, how about a new mailbox? You've seen it, you know what I'm talking about ...

Anyway, I shall continue to seethe with jealousy when I witness these posts, hoping and praying that one day Santa does get his butt stuck in my chimney, owing me big time when I winch him free. I don't expect I'll ever get Alcide from the back of his sleigh, but I'd totally settle for the fat free chocolate and a cardboard cut out if the elves can't pull something off.
Have a good one everyone,

Kristy ;)

Monday 12 December 2011

Monday Moaning

This is just a super quick post today. I thought I'd let you know how my Saturday night out on the town went.
Well ... It went.
At 2.30pm I was tucking myself between the cool, crisp sheets of my bed, completely wide awake after a gigantic night of booze, debauchery and muscle bound weirdos dressed as Santa.
Okay, so I personally might have bypassed excessive alcohol consumption and debauchery on account of my Hobbitish nature and general lack know-how, but I still got up to mischief. Said mischief resulted in a sore bum from dancing the night away and bleary eyes from staying up waaayyy past my bedtime. But still ... I had a great time for someone that usually gets excited about cracking a can of 'V' and settling in to watch back to back episodes of Supernatural on the telly.
Needless to say I may just experiment a little bit more with this 'getting out of the house' venture.
1. I just may meet a vampire since I tend to look like one these days with my pasty indoor complexion.
2. Turns out there are lots of people that exist outside my front door. Some of them are even nice. Some of them make me scream and run in the other direction. I'm told this is called 'Chasing tail'.
3. I have no shame about busting crap-ass dance moves on the dance floor. Reckless abandon is good for you and the other crap-ass dancers next to you.
4. That face I'm pulling does an excellent job of repelling just about any gropey-ass git with a five fingered agenda in sight.
5. I don't have to stay at home listening to replays of 'All by Myself'.
Morale of the story? I'm breaking out, busting moves, and kicking it for the introverts everywhere.
Have a good one ... I will be.

Kristy :)